Captivate the Room
Achieve Success with Rob Scott

Achieve Success with Rob Scott

August 19, 2019

Prior episode: 

Changing Your Inner Voice, Identity Shifting w/ Rob Scott

Rob's website: https://robscott.com/

Welcome to the show!

Today you are in for a treat because the incredible Rob Scott has returned to Captivate the Room for a second visit.  Rob is one of the most extraordinary people I’ve ever met.  From his story, to what he’s overcome, to the work he does today he never ceases to amaze.

In today’s episode Rob and I talk about:

Identity shifting, what it is and why it’s so important,

What is the shadow work,

Storycasting,

What a mind virus is and how we get rid of it,

Being, doing and winning,

Trying to achieve success and fulfillment and settling for only one of them,

How we can quickly transform issues that we feel hopeless about,

Rob’s thoughts on my documentary and what parent’s need to do to ensure their children feel heard and more!

 

Guest Bio

Rob Scott is the expert that helps people break through, change and literally evolve their consciousness.  Rob goes beyond just mindset shifting, he shifts your very identity and he’s world-class at this.  Rob shifts people who think they’ll never be a successful entrepreneur and turns them into massively successful entrepreneurs, he takes people who never think they’ll have success and turns them into incredible success stories.  Rob’s spent the last decade of his life working with hundreds of thousands of people, shifting their identities and showing them how to evolve their consciousness and get incredible results across all areas of their businesses, their health, their relationships and their entire lives.

Rob’s personally been awake now for more than 20 years and has been helping others wake up for more than a decade.  He’s helped craft congressional testimony multiple times which has led to national policy reform in American, has thousands of followers that he feels blessed to interact with and is the coach other coaches come to in order to shift themselves.  People who work with him have massive breakthroughs of more money, more health, more time and quite simply, more happiness and fulfillment.

Identity Shifting:  http://www.identityshifting.com/

Recode your mind:  http://www.recodeyourmind.com

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/realrobscott/

Facebook:  http://www.facebook.com/realrobscott/

Linked In: http://www.linkedin.com/in/therobscott/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/rob_scott

 

Making an Impression with Mary Grace Gardner

Making an Impression with Mary Grace Gardner

August 12, 2019

Welcome to the show!

Today's episode originally aired 4/8/18 but there is SO much valuable information to share that I wanted to run it again for those who may have missed it!

You are in for such a treat with today’s guest Mary Grace Gardner.  Mary Grace is an expert in all things interviewing both college and career. 

I’ve seen her work and she is truly an expert and has so much valuable information about the in’s and out’s of what it takes to land your dream job through the interview process or getting your child into their top college pick.

If you’ve got a high school student and are starting to do the prep to get him/her into the college of their dreams, looking to get some help with scholarships this is the show for you.

Or, are a job seeker that wants to land that next interview or get to the next level in your current career, you don’t want to miss this episode either!

Mary Grace’s work also aligns with my work significantly!

Today we are talking about:

Exactly what it takes to land that dream school or position,

How the voice plays a key role in the interviewing process,

What is one of the key factors in getting into the college of your dreams,

How you can make it through college debt free,

Big mistakes job interviewees make,

Important technique before and during the actual interview,

And More!

 You can sign up for more information on the essay workshops here.

Guest Bio

Mary Grace Gardner is a  college admission and career coach with over ten years of experience helping students apply to colleges using what she learned as part of the admissions council for one of the top universities in the United States combined with what she did to get accepted into schools like UCLA, Yale, and Johns Hopkins.

She graduated from both undergraduate and graduate school completely debt free thanks to scholarships.

After graduate school, Mary Grace landed a competitive fellowship in healthcare administration and quickly rose in the ranks of leadership. She has reviewed thousands of resumes and interviewed applicants for roles ranging from administrative assistant to senior executive. She knows exactly what it takes to stand out from other applicants and land your dream job.

You can find her at https://www.facebook.com/theyoung.professionista/

or http://theyoungprofessionista.com/

Resistance and Your Voice

Resistance and Your Voice

August 5, 2019

Resistance: you may have felt it in certain areas of your life but did you ever have any idea that it could be keeping you from your next level of success through your voice?

Today we will talk about things to look for, why it happens, and the true power of your voice that resistance is trying to keep down. Resistance is your subconscious keeping you safe; keeping you small. Let's break through that! Join me today!

Your reviews on iTunes make a difference for this show! Please Subscribe and Review on iTunes.  

I am running a contest! To enter: leave me a review on iTunes and send me a screenshot to Tracy@CaptivateTheRoom.com and you'll be entered to win a free voice coaching session with me. The reviews really make a difference in the search rankings and I am on a mission to reach as many people as possible. Registration is closing after this show. I will draw the name on-air the first week of September. 

Resistance. There are a lot of ways resistance crops up and it is always found in voice work - even if you don't realize it! It may be in the form of certain habits that are keeping you from the next level of success. I see people doing things, even subconsciously, that is resisting going bigger. Your subconscious is going to do everything it can to keep you safe, which means keeping you small. The voice is the utmost place of judgment, of vulnerability. Your subconscious works hard to keep you from getting too big, too bold, or too risky. All these things you're being told by your subconscious will keep your masks up, will keep you nice and safe but will keep you from reaching the next level in your business and/or personal life. Judgment is not about you; being afraid of it is resistance. 

Why is this work important? The voice is the most powerful tool you have. It is how we, your audience, determine every single thing about you. The biggest problem I see for so many people is that what they are revealing in their voice is not who they really are. Thus, they struggle with connections. Their masks are causing them to be rejected and preventing them from putting out the best versions of themselves. This becomes exhausting but we are resistant to put down the masks. I don't focus on just technique. I focus on what is the best version of YOU and how do we crack those masks to communicate that to the world? The words are everything and nothing; it's how you bring them to life that has the power to change me. Data is important but it's not going to make me feel.

Trust is built in the voice; science has proven that. If you want people to trust you, they need to hear it in your voice. Subconsciously, your voice is where you reveal your message, your vulnerabilities, the wings of your soul, the orchestra of your heart. You can see why there may be so much resistance to protect you. Resistance can be found in masks such as hurt, pain, suffering, embarrassment, humiliation, experiences. When we are hiding behind masks, we are fully resistant. You can hear volumes in voices: barriers, connection, lack of connection. Use your ears but also trust your intuition. Your subconscious is processing what it is hearing. If there is resistance or fakeness, you can hear it as you begin to pay attention.

We all have to push through certain things. When you get to the other side, your life is forever changed. You're transformed in a way you never dreamed. If you're feeling resistance, don't worry. You're exactly where you need to be. Let it be your guide and remind you that you are on the right track of where you need to go next. It's up yo you to decide how and when you're going to push through it.

Until next time, you know what to do. Get out there and speak your truth, just do it beautifully. 

Facebook

Captivate the Room website

YouTube

Free training! The Voice Formula

Instagram

Subscribe and Review on iTunes

Vulnerability and Your Voice

Vulnerability and Your Voice

July 29, 2019

Welcome to the show! 

Your reviews on iTunes make a difference for this show! Please Subscribe and Review on iTunes. 

Vulnerability. That's a scary word. Voice work is vulnerability; creating a reveal of the best version of you. People tend to get themselves in trouble by creating vulnerability within their voice the wrong way. Listen to today's episode to find out how you can use vulnerability in your voice to your advantage.

We make every decision based on every tone we process - consciously and subconsciously - based on what we hear in your voice.

Vulnerability is not about information. I see it everywhere. What I hear people doing is revealing detail with their words but wearing so many masks with their voice. They have this incorrect idea that they have to reveal detail or extreme emotion in order to get people to feel something. That couldn't be further from the truth. Vulnerability is not about the deep, dark, dirty secrets of your life. Think about the people you think of as vulnerable speakers: you don't know the minutia. There are some things that are shared as a choice, but not out of necessity, to connect with your audience. 

I believe there are elements of our stories that are key or essential in telling, but we don't have to dive deep into every single secret. Ask yourself: does this benefit or serve your audience? Vulnerability is not about what you share but how you share it. What becomes the problem and what we have to analyze when we want to become vulnerable is what are we trying to hide behind? Which voice masks are you utilizing to keep you "safe"? Are you 100% revealing who you truly are by using your voice? Maybe the need to get it right? People pleasing? Control? Not allowing people in? Most of your masks or bad voice habits are learned by the time you are two and it's not always due to trauma. These masks can manifest in many different ways and tones in your voice. They're subtle but they're everything; your audience is processing them subconsciously and it prevents us from truly connecting with you as if it were bulletproof glass keeping you at arms' length. Your voice is the most vulnerable tool that you have. When people know who you are, they let you in. People can feel it when you're not letting them in or when you're not being vulnerable with your voice. 

Until next time, you know what to do. Get out there and speak your truth, just do it beautifully. 

Facebook

Captivate the Room website

YouTube

Free training! The Voice Formula

Instagram

Subscribe and Review on iTunes

Not Feeling Heard and How to Change That

Not Feeling Heard and How to Change That

July 22, 2019

Welcome to the show!

 Not feeling heard feels a lot like not belonging. It's devastating to confidence. They're both critical to your success, to your confidence, and to your own worthiness. So many people don't feel heard and I see what is laid into peoples' voices in an effort to be heard. Today, we're going to talk about exactly what you need to do and why it's so important to feel heard when you speak. 

Upcoming workshop:

Voice for Women Live Online Workshop on July 23

Facebook

Captivate the Room website

YouTube

Free training! The Voice Formula

Instagram

Subscribe and Review on iTunes

What’s Wrong with Trying to Get the Words Right

What’s Wrong with Trying to Get the Words Right

July 19, 2019

Welcome to the show!

Trying to get the words just right. Is that you? For whatever reason, you believe that if you can get those words just right, you're going to get what you want. You're going to be able to control how we feel and think. What you're actually doing is putting a mask in place that will end up being the very thing that will keep you from getting that result. Let's shift that today. When we shift that, we will be able to hear your confidence, connect with you, and you can captivate the room.

Let's talk about the fear of not getting the words right and what that does to your voice. This is something both men and women struggle with. Some of my comments may be more geared to women specifically as this is something they tend to struggle with more, but it can be applied to both men and women dealing with this.

This is something I see in almost everyone I work with. This ideology of having to get the words just. right. You cannot control what I think about you. You can reveal the best version of you and you can release the outcome, but you cannot control what I think about you. YOU are the expert. YOU are educating us. We don't know what you know. Yes, there are facts, data, and information. You may make a mistake because you're human. It's not "wrong"; you're human. By focusing on being "right," and trying to keep people happy, focusing on the outcome you want and what you think we want you to be, you are putting a mask in place. This behavior has been conditioned throughout of lives: being motivated by a fear of something going wrong or something bad happening if you get something "wrong." Don't give your power to your words. The power is not in your words. Your power is in making me feel something. You may mess up the data but you won't mess up the feeling you cause me to feel. The hesitation, pausing, and fumbling that happens when you're struggling to get things just right causes more damage than just connecting with your message, your audience, and releasing the outcome.  

 

Don't get so bogged down in getting it 'right' that we, as your audience, don't know what you're talking about.

This will be my last Friday podcast for now. Keep looking for my regularly schedule podcasts on Tuesday mornings!

Until next time, you know what to do: get out there and speak your truth; just do it beautifully.

Upcoming workshops:

3 Hour Live Hands-On Psychology of the Voice Effect Workshop on July 20th

Voice for Women Live Online Workshop on July 23

Facebook

Captivate the Room website

YouTube

Free training! The Voice Formula

Instagram

Subscribe and Review on iTunes

You Can Have Voice Power

You Can Have Voice Power

July 15, 2019

Welcome to the show!

Voice power: you want it, but how do you get it? Today, I'm going to teach you to find the balance between confidence and power to boldly own exactly what you need to say and find internal freedom.

 The middle voice - the middle ground that exists within the pendulum of voice patterns. People tend to stay on one side or the other of the swing but the true power lies within the middle. True voice power is found in the middle voice.

Women usually get stuck in the high-pitched, sweet/nice voice with the fear that if they move to a stronger sounding voice, they come across as 'the B word.'

Men usually wrestle with sounding professional vs. unprofessional.

The middle is where your true voice is. This is where true confidence lies. This is where you say what you need to say, releasing the outcome, and not concerned about what others are thinking. The term "power" or "powerful" does not need to have negative connotations. What are your beliefs around power? Do they limit you from stepping into your powerful voice?

Take this as your permission slip to use your middle voice. To ask for what you what. To stand in ownership of what you believe and boldly put it out there.

Release your pressure valve before you swing to the other side, the other extreme from built-up pressure. If you're struggling to find that middle ground, go out to the parking lot or somewhere private and just say whatever it is you want to say. Then, when you go back in and speak directly with them, the edge has been taken off and you are able to find center.

You can reach my fabulous editor, Archie, here.

Until next time, you know what to do: get out there and speak your truth; just do it beautifully.

Upcoming workshops:

3 Hour Live Hands-On Psychology of the Voice Effect Workshop on July 20th

Voice for Women Live Online Workshop on July 23

Facebook

Captivate the Room website

YouTube

Free training! The Voice Formula

Instagram

Subscribe and Review on iTunes

Stop Being Interrupted

Stop Being Interrupted

July 12, 2019

Welcome to the show!

 

Do you ever get interrupted? Are you interrupted repeatedly? This can lead to you not feeling heard and eventually, you just stop talking. If that's you, listen along to find out how to stop being interrupted. If you're on the opposite end and find yourself being the interruptER, I'll have some valuable nuggets for you as well. 

Special accountment: Ladies! Special, free, live training on July 23 (Gentlemen - your special, free training is coming). Sign up for the workshop

Think back to your own psychology of the voice story. Can you think of an instance in your childhood where you were shut down, told to be quiet, etc.? It's usually a combination of that experience plus something else ("that and").

Every single sound paid the same admission price to get out of your mouth. Every sound has to get out, or you have to start giving refunds. Dropping endings leads people to believe you are finished with your current thought and may lead to being interrupted. One way to overcome this is to vary the inflection in your sentence - up, down, up, down - especially around commas and sentence endings.

Do you struggle with wanting to get all of the words right? Don't stop and think about what you're going to say next. Release the grip of getting it right and focus on how you can formulate your thoughts faster so you're not starting/stopping or speaking slowly.

If you're interrupted:

Tell the person who interrupted you that you're not finished. What scares you is thinking that you'll sound like a jerk, but keep a neutral and/or kind tone and you won't. Tonality makes a difference.
Keep talking. Raise your volume if needed. Make it clear that you weren't finished. Don't give your power away and reclaim your voice.

Everyone deserves to be heard. Everyone needs to be heard. Most people aren't.

Get out there and speak your truth; just do it beautifully.

Facebook

Captivate the Room website

YouTube

Free training! The Voice Formula

Instagram

Subscribe and Review on iTunes

Damage from Blame in Voice and Communication

Damage from Blame in Voice and Communication

July 8, 2019

Welcome to the show!

Susie Connerley is back for more great advice and discussion in our final installment of this four-part series. Today's discussion is regarding damage from blame in voice and communication. Find the other episodes, as well as Susie's first episode with me, below in the show notes.

 

Today we will discuss blame, why it's so important to take responsibility and the incredible things that happen when you eradicate blame from your voice and your communication.

Blame is very problematic with regards to tone and taking responsibility so you can communicate effectively. We've covered expectations, people-pleasing, and boundaries in the other episodes.

What are boundaries? They are the invisible lines - physical, mental, emotional, or through your voice. There are a lot of different ways to set boundaries, cross boundaries, and have your boundaries crossed. This is a hot topic but many people don't realize that they have to work through their own issues before they can their own boundaries from a healthy place. Most people learn about boundaries - or the lack thereof - in their childhood from their parents.

You serve others and yourself better when you set boundaries, but there is this misconception with boundaries that people interpret you as being mean, inconsiderate, pushy, unloving, shutting others out, a jerk, etc. Because of this, many of us swing between either no boundaries or too many boundaries.

Boundaries are not meant to be negative. When implemented and respected correctly, they set up a really good understanding and expectations. People like to know where the lines are (some people don’t and that’s a red flag) and this creates healthy respect and balance in relationships.

What about when people feel wounded and rejected by others’ boundaries? Is it because we take it personally or we’re not able to get what we want? Are our expectations unmet? You have to be really conscious about what your motives are when relating to other people. Each person is unconsciously wanting something from each interaction and you have to be very honest with yourself to check your own motivations and process your own emotions. Why am I not setting a boundary? Why do I not like the boundary you’re setting? Am I willing to give up part of my boundary (or cross yours) because I want something in return?  Boundaries are tested usually as a power play or testing to see how far they can go/what they will be able to get away with, whether consciously or unconsciously.

Is there a fear of setting boundaries because of one’s desire to avoid conflict and have everything be “OK”? People make excuses and reason away others’ actions and avoiding confrontation which only sets the stage for that behavior to happen again and again. You have to decide you are worth more. Acknowledge how much time and energy you spend trying to make other people happy. What are you giving up in the long run for your temporary comfort or avoidance of conflict? We teach people how to treat us by the boundaries that we do or don't set. Give yourself permission to be OK with what you want.

 

Get out there and speak your truth; just do it beautifully.

Susie Connerley is a Rapid Transformational Therapist who has been working in the wellness arena for 11 years to maximize results, help people achieve real change and become more of who they truly are. With a background in psychology, energy therapy, and meditation, she has a unique ability to see the origin of where people are shutting themselves down and help them come into full empowerment. Susie is on a mission to revolutionize the way we communicate in our relationships by connecting to who we truly are and finding and freeing our voices for good.

YouTube 

Instagram 

Prior episodes:

https://captivatetheroom.com/susie/
https://captivatetheroom.com/people-pleasing/
https://captivatetheroom.com/expectations/
https://captivatetheroom.com/boundaries/

Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/captivatetheroom/?

Website:
http://www.captivatetheroom.com

YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/user/theredsweaterlady

Free training! The Voice Formula:
https://captivatetheroom.com/voice-formula/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/captivatetheroom/

Subscribe and Review on iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/captivate-the-room/id1091333779

Boundaries and Using Your Voice

Boundaries and Using Your Voice

July 2, 2019

Boundaries in communication are a building block and we are starting with the cycle of blame. Susie Connerley is back for more great advice and discussion.

What is blame?
Finding a scapegoat in something and putting it all on another party or on yourself. It's a false sense of responsibility: it's either all this person/situation's fault or it's all my fault.

Why do we blame?
Many people have dynamics learned in childhood - how did your parents handle blame? Accountability and honesty are not necessarily taught to us and many people do not learn these skills until adulthood, if ever.
People tend to associate blame with being "bad" and tarnishing their image. We need to learn to separate behavior from who we are as people. We are not our actions. We are responsible for our actions but they are not who we are. People are inundated with "be a good boy/girl" from a young age and start to internalize shame for "wrong" behavior.
Shame is, "you're bad." Guilt is, "I don't like what you did but I still love you."
A lot of people will take others' actions personally and are still stuck in the "me, me, me."

What happens when we blame?
It affects our relationships and our ability to connect with others. It clouds our perception of others and the events transpiring.
People who are unable to accountable for the actions are much more disconnected from seeing why they do what they do.
We are products of our environments and continue to reflect that behavior until we make conscious and concentrated efforts to change.

Children bear the brunt of parents not being able to be honest with themselves and being aware of their boundaries and blame behavior. People are often trying to make up for emotional deficits from their childhood. The only environment children know are the one they are raised in. That means they end up trying to find ways and become conditioned to behave in ways to control their behavior, worth, and/or environment, beginning the blame cycle (unconscious internalization). 

People can say words like "authentic" and "vulnerable" and not be telling you anything real about themselves. There is a massive tendency to either bypass or have socially acceptable ways of being authentic that is anything but. Emotions are not logical and are uncomfortable because we have not been taught how to deal with them.  

Susie Connerley is a Rapid Transformational Therapist who has been working in the wellness arena for 11 years to maximize results, help people achieve real change and become more of who they truly are. With a background in psychology, energy therapy, and meditation, she has a unique ability to see the origin of where people are shutting themselves down and help them come into full empowerment. Susie is on a mission to revolutionize the way we communicate in our relationships by connecting to who we truly are and finding and freeing our voices for good.

YouTube

Instagram 

Prior episodes:

https://captivatetheroom.com/susie/
https://captivatetheroom.com/people-pleasing/

Get out there and speak your truth; just do it beautifully.

Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/captivatetheroom/?

Website:
http://www.captivatetheroom.com

YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/user/theredsweaterlady

Free training! The Voice Formula:
https://captivatetheroom.com/voice-formula/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/captivatetheroom/

Subscribe and Review on iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/captivate-the-room/id1091333779